I am sitting here listening to Pandora turned up so loud in my earphones that I am sure it is damaging my hearing. Mom fought us for 3 hours last night about going to bed. Two of us literally had been blockading her bed to keep her in it. She was mean, combative and expected us to feel sorry for her. But, to let her out meant that she would fall (which she did, twice). But, we were the bad guys. In her mind, we deserved every mean thing that she could say or do. I might have but my daughter did not. It killed me to even have to ask her to help me. The sleeping pill that I gave Mom at 9 finally kicked in at midnight and she passed out from exhaustion.
Fast forward to 6 o'clock this morning when it all began again. Apparently, she had to be up to get ready for school. I was able to keep her in bed, mostly, until the girls made their escapes at 7:20. Breakfast was eaten and her first dose of anti-anxiety medicine of the morning was served. It kicked in about 8. As did her lack of sleep. She took a few mini-naps. Unfortunately, she woke up from the last one delusional and pissed at the world. I tried everything I know to calm her. Lunch, conversation, explanations, screaming. You know, all the things that calm people.
So, here I am blaring music in my ears drowning out the constant banging of that damned hammer. Yep, I 'm listening to Gary Allen sing about how all storms run out of rain and all nights eventually turn to day. Followed by Simon and Garfunkel singing about the sounds of silence. The only way that I see this song set ending is with The Impossible Dream.
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